Personality Profile Paranoia


…brought to you by the letter “P”

I had an interview last week for a position in Children’s Ministry at that I assume (yes, I know what “ass u me” stands for.  Still.)  went fairly well, since I remain “in process.”  After the interview, it was requested that I take a personality test.  I had taken a paper version of one of these for my former ministry position at but this time I was told to look for an email with a link to the online testing process. 

Now granted, I am a wee bit anxious to get the ball rolling, and the director says/acts like she is quite ready for me to start, so you can imagine that I may have been just a little tad small bit semi-obsessive about checking my email every 5 minutes over the next 12-26 hours.  I checked my email so often, that it was hard to believe once 24 hours went by that it had only been a day.  Have you ever had days like that? 

So after waiting until the appropriate time of day, I dashed off a reply so that my potential employer’s Powers That Be (you know…the human ones) ((LOL!  I just cracked myself up with that Powers That Be reference after the last 4 days wordy postings on HE IS!  siiiiiigh.  Anyhoo)) would know that I have not ONLY been lolling around eating Sweet & Salty Almond Bars and watching What Not To Wear marathons, but that I have, in fact, been constantly looking for the link and have not yet received it.  They promptly said they would look into it, and did I happen to check my Spam folder?  That’s when it hit me…

Maybe THIS is part of the personality test.  Organization?  Oh no. 

Truly, I have 2 “spam” folders because, though I am a tosser with real life stuff, as witnessed by our newly emptied garage, unfortunately I neglect that attribute when it comes to email.  I had 8743 emails in the junk mail while I had whittled down my real inbox to just under 200.

But lo & behold I did but find the link.  Hallel U Jah! 

Too bad it was only the teaser link to the website warning me to LOOK for ANOTHER email that would BE COMING from this source.  Which I still had not received.

NOW I am fully believing that if this is, indeed, part of the test, I am TOTALLY FLUNKING the patience section.

I made calls this time.  And kept my “no biggie” demeanor.  I hope that scores me some flippin’ extra credit.

A few hours later, I finally FINALLY got the link to the 88 question double true-or-false test.  These were thought provoking statements such as “Most people put forth the least amount of effort at their job to collect their paycheck.”  and “I am always honest in all situations.”  After each statement was 2 sets of  TRUE or FALSE answers: one answer indicated “the ideal candidate for the job you are applying for” and the other answer “for your true self.”   Alrighty then.

I stood up and effectively threatened all the neighborhood kids–who had wandered over during the day and were happily partying their young summer day away with all manner of music, TV, billiards, plastic bows and arrows, loud games of LIFE (talk about your irony) and sloshing through the kitchen fresh from the neighbor’s pool to cut up watermelon and spit the seeds–within an inch of their life if they didn’t KEEP IT DOWN while I took the rackafrackin’ TEST FOR MY JOB I had been waiting for.

Heavy Sigh…

I dashed off the answers in record time, even reveiwing them at the end and tweaking a few.  When I submitted the answers, all I got was a “Thank you.  Your results will be sent to the requesting party.”

Now I wait.  AGAIN.

I wonder if “How You Deal With Lack Of Feedback” is part of the test too?  

Oh botha.


7 responses »

  1. If they now what’s good for um, they’ll hire you DESPITE your personality profile . . . did I say that?? ahem…. I mean how could they exist without your spectacular and very REAL, loyal, beautiful and delightfully fun self. TRUE.

    love you,

    PS I guess I have to confess I didn’t read the biblical blogs, either, seeing as you can look it up, and all. Sorry. I planned to go back and read when I had the energy (and maybe less salty chocolate).

    PSS got the tix tonight. Connie wants to keep Olivia, so it will be just me. Can’t wait to see you!!

  2. If they knew that your blog was sponsored by the letter “P” that would surely convince them of your worthiness for Children’s Ministry! But they’d better hurry and reel you in before the Preschool Director finds out.

  3. The Results are IN!

    You are characterized by a high degree of empathy and an activity level that is even-paced and consistent.
    You are able to enjoy close relationships that are totally honest and open. You are able to comfortably
    communicate and thoroughly enjoy helping others when they are in need. You are quite supportive when
    working with others in any team effort. “Supporters” are described as: friendly, helpful, kind, slow to act,
    non-threatening, soft-hearted, easy-going, responsive, willing, careful, non-competitive, and leisurely.

  4. You are characterized by a moderately low energy level which is directed outward towards intuitive,
    non-analytical pursuits. You have slow, relaxed, leisurely movements and are not typically motivated by
    short-term goals which demand immediate satisfaction. You do not normally spend time analyzing,
    organizing, or interpreting complex technical data. You would rather spend the time in either physical or
    social pursuits. You are described as “easy-going” because there is no real sense of urgency associated
    with your carefree manner. You are described as: objective, leisurely, relaxed, calm, inexact, intuitive,
    and non-analytical. Opposites include: high-strung, stimulated, quick, calculating, precise, hyperactive,
    energetic, and intense.

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