Monthly Archives: December 2009

SongSlayer…2010 Winter Olympic edition


Samsung Knew


And Crush Too

Would make great Mobile Explorers

Funny thing, but you can bring them

Right to Vancou-oo-ver

And before you know it you’re there too

They’re just a real good choice,

Just a real good choice.


Sam (sam) Sung (sung) Knew (kneeeeeew)


and (and) Crush (crush) Too (toooooooo)

will be great Mobile Explorers!

Me & You will go there to

Bring fun stuff to everyone

Who follows friends or favorites on our blog

It such an awesome choice,

Such an awesome choice.

Curling ROCKS! Who Knew?


Countdown to the 2010 Vancouver Games

Kid 4 and I are embarking on an ambitious challenge.  We are attempting to become Samsung Mobile Explorers who will share the Olympics with all through video, blog and mobile updates.   Great gig if you can get it, right?   I’m sayin!

So I’m brushing up on my winter games research.  Where better to start than Curling?

Photo courtesy of Jim Thompson Olympic Photos

I’ve always wondered what the big deal was.  I always thought that the sport looked like a miniature version of How I Clean My House….Wait around for someone to get slung in my direction then frantically brush away a path  to walk through until they hit the Mark which would be Where The Food Is.   So one guy slings some giant puck thingy, and a couple of intensely focused sweepers swishy swhishy to get some ice shavings out of the way.  I don’t get it.

Newsflash:  It turns out Curling is COMPLEX.   Wikipedia calls it “chess on ice.”   Well butter my biscuits, now we’re talking sport with strategy and teamwork.  Bring it, curling.  Let’s see whatcha got.

First of all the ice is a carefully prepared rectangle.  Sounds a bit like the greens on a golf course perhaps?  Do you KNOW anyone who works for/manages/frequents a golf course?  If not, just watch Caddyshack & you’ll see how OCD the greenskeepers can be.  Even fictional ones.  So a rectangle of ice is bound to bring out the control freak in some maintenance person behind the scenes.   THAT’S a reality show waiting to happen.

Secondly each team has four (4) players.  As in FOUR.    One slides the heavy granite stone down the ice towards the house.  (That’s target to you & me).  After the launch, two sweepers equipped with brooms & GPS-type timing equipment scoot down ahead of the granite rock directing it where to go.  This is where it gets amazing.  People, they are not just smoothing out the ice for the stone to slide across like so many mini-zamboni brooms.  They are actually carving an intentional path for that thing.  With purpose.  And teamwork.  And the hoots & hollers from others (one of which I’m guessing  is the 4th guy) who are actually directing the stone where to go and how fast.  Can you even imagine the drama for those sweeper guys in those moments?  Picture any family member and/or coach on the sidelines of any sport that takes place for 30 minutes to an hour, condense it into 45 seconds and I bet it might mirror curling tension.  I’m still not sure what else the fourth guy does…maybe they take turns slinging the granite or maybe he’s the human GPS navigator of the group.  Either way, they’ve got their work cut out for them, because if they don’t land on the house, they have to at least land closer than their opponents to secure the coveted victory.   

I’m a little embarrassed that it never occured to me that curling took actual skill–not to mention accomplished group dynamics.   Which adds a whole ‘nother dimension of difficulty, as anyone who deals with other people will attest.  There’s a kind of teamwork where participants are doing individual jobs where others can pick up your slack if you fail (like a marching band), and there’s the kind of teamwork where you are each part of a whole where you are the only one doing exactly what you do (like a rock band).  If one part is missing, mission not accomplished.  

Olympic Curling athletes, I am now inspired anew to sling, brush and navigate in my little corner of the world as you do so well in yours.  Train hard.  Rest up.  And get ready to BRING IT  in 2010!  I will be cheering you on.  Hopefully in person!

singing songs about Jesus


We got snowed out of North Carolina.

As in…it didn’t snow HERE where we were, it snowed THERE where we were going.  A LOT.

As a staff person/teacher in Children’s Ministry, I don’t often (ever) get a chance to go visit other churches.  Sometimes I don’t even make it into my own “Big Church.”  So we decided that since our bases were covered in preparation for the trip to Grand’s, we would pay a little visit to a nearby elementary school.  Which is the temporary home of a brand new church called Essential.

On the walk from the vehicle to to front door of Not Our Church Or Elementary School, we had a little conversation with the confused kids about how church doesn’t have to be IN an actual church building to still be “church.”  Church=People + Jesus.

They were like, “Whatevs.  It’s still weird.”

Then we walked in and were greeted and nametagged and fed delicious yumminess and led in singing all the great Christmas songs.  We heard that the equipment truck was frozen in place in the storage facility.   I thought they did quite well for not having any of the usual “stuff.”  12 year old 3rd child said that the worship leader  should be on American Idol.  When I told her that maybe he likes what he’s doing MORE than becoming famous, she just rolled her eyes at the ceiling.  I don’t know what she was looking at up there.  The boy said the food was the best part and the husband imagined  himself up there playing bass guitar.

After a clip from the Rosanne show on religion and a talk on the difference between being in relationship versus following religious rules & customs, the lady that poured me a cup of coffee stood up at the end of service to share that she had decided to begin a relationship with Jesus that very morning.  So did two more ladies in front of her.

Now THAT is what “essential church” is all about.

Christmas with Dixie


Oh, Santa.  I’m so sorry about your hat.

Look on the bright side…we rescued you before she got to your face. 

It could’ve been SO.  MUCH.  worse.  I mean, look what she did to her own bed:


Now, regarding behavior.  I think I’ve been semi-good.  Some of the time.  Except for…

At least I remembered to water one of the poinsettias.  That should count for something. 

I think the 15 year old has gotten confused with the whole “stockings hung from the chimney with care” idea.   (Bless his heart…he has other skills).

But just behold how neatly the empty decoration boxes have been stacked.  In the living room. 

So I guess what I’m hoping is you’ll cut us some slack.  We love each other and we love Jesus.

Merry Christmas!  There’s always hope for an “after” post, right?

SongSlayer: Christmas Edition


I heard a delightful idea just now on KLove.  They mentioned that practically any family situation could be sung to the tune of Feliz Navidad.

I am UP for that challenge.

Why, just on the drive across town I thought up:

It’s time to wake up.

It’s time to wake up.

It’s time to turn off your alarm clock and shower up.  HA ha!

You slept in that shirt, you can not wear it.

You slept in that shirt, you can not wear it.

Please eat your breakfast,  brush your teeth, and use toothpa-haste.

Or how about this Mom version:

I can’t find my keys.

I can’t find my keys.

I can’t find my keys, and I just had them a second ago.

I need a spouce who will help me find them.

I need a child who will help me find them.

I need a friend who will help me find them in the bottom of my coat pock-et!

And the ever classic:

What’s made for dinner?

What’s made for dinner?

What’s made for dinner, I hope it’s Ham-boig-ah Heh-hel-pah.

No thank you I’m not feeling that hungry.

No thank you I’m not feeling too famished.

No thank you I’m not so fond of what/you so loving/ly prepa-haired…

What would YOUR version(s) be?

Christmas Lurve


1 Corinthians 13 Christmas Style
©By Sharon Jaynes
If I decorate my house perfectly with lovely plaid bows, strands of twinkling lights, and shiny glass balls, but do not show love to my family – I’m just another decorator.
If I slave away in the kitchen, baking dozens of Christmas cookies, preparing gourmet meals, and arranging a beautifully adorned table at mealtime, but do not show love to my family – I’m just another cook.
If I work at the soup kitchen, carol in the nursing home, and give all that I have to charity, but do not show love to my family – it profits me nothing.
If I trim the spruce with shimmering angels and crocheted snowflakes, attend a myriad of holiday parties, and sing in the choir’s cantata but do not focus on Christ, I have missed the point.
Love stops the cooking to hug the child.
Love sets aside the decorating to kiss the husband.
Love is kind, though harried and tired.
Love doesn’t envy another home that has coordinated Christmas china and table linens.
Love doesn’t yell at the kids to get out of your way.
Love doesn’t give only to those who are able to give in return, but rejoices in giving to those who can’t.
Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things.
Love never fails.  Video games will break; pearl necklaces will be lost; golf clubs will rust.  But giving the gift of love will endure.

Broncos RULE!


It was a great night of football.   60+ degrees under a full moon.

The Broncos were ready to finish the Championship game that got called early due to bad weather on Monday.

We left the field that night just after our 2nd touchdown.  The Redskins had scored first but Broncos came back strong and were up 14-6 when the refs made the call to continue the game on Thursday under dryer circumstances.

And finish it, they did!  Two more touchdowns in the 2nd 1/2 and no more points for the ‘skins.  WHOOT WHOOT!

The best part is when the parents and the boys all cheered for each other and the massive, Two-Team Huddle.

…plus also?  I got another football mom to snap a great shot of the family.  HELLO CHRISTMAS CARD!

Onward to Upward!  (Basketball, that is)

Marriage Counseling for Socks


I suppose you are wondering why you’ve each been assembled here rather than tucked away into your normal drawer.  It’s because I want to talk to you all about commitment.


Each and every one of you entered into this home with a partner.   Some of you came in already commited Small Groups of 6, 8 or even 10.  But look at you now. 

Here you are.  In a huge pile.  Surrounded by others who have lost or been left behind by their original mate.  This is heartbreaking and tragic and our entire community is adversely effected. 

For example.  You.  Blue-Banded Footie Sock.  You think you are just as happy with the cute little Red-Banded Footie Sock you sat next to for a few days as you waited for your mates in the next load.  When they never showed up, you hung out around the house together.   Then you got brave and went OUT together.  People stared, but you didn’t mind.   Shame on you.

And you, Sports Tape Residue-Covered soccer sock.  You are obviously scarred for life.   But guess what.  SO IS YOUR PARTNER.  Maybe if you tried, you could both understand each other and your bond would grow deeper.  You might even use those scars to stick together when things get heated.  Like in the dryer.

Now you, rainbow toe-sock.  You are different.  Maybe you dream of what it would be like to settle down with that dashing navy solid.  Read my lips.  IT.  WILL.  NEVER.  HAPPEN.

If you are curious about Crusty, Hole-E-Filled, and Dog Snack, their days are gone.  We can only wonder if they would be with us today had they not gone off alone somewhere. 

It’s not too late for the rest of you.  Let’s stick together, folks.  Two are better than one.