April Fool’s Awesomesauce


Yesterday our New Driver got the car for a few hours while I was at work.

I told him to either pick me back up at 9:00 after the game or text me an updated plan once he spoke to his dad after guitar.

I watched him drive away.  In the only car we have that can hold the entire family.

We worked a plan for me to get picked up by Hubby after work.  New Driver promised he’d be home by 9:30.   We were willing to negotiate, but that was his call.  What a noob.

We thought our New Driver would be home by the time we got home, car safely parked in the driveway at 10:15.

He wasn’t.

We called.

He didn’t answer.  The plot thickens.

We knew where he was so Hubby came up with a brilliant idea.

An awful idea.

The Grinch got a terrible awful idea…

Can’t you just see his smile?

You’re a mean one, Curfew Grinch!

“Let’s just drive over to That Chick’s house and pick up the car.  I bet we’ll hear from him then.”

Thank God New Driver was where he said he would be.  Had he not been, I would have been getting terrible/awful ideas of my own.

So we pulled up, I got in (it was locked) and drove away.

We placed bets on how we thought he’d come home.  Will he get a ride?  Run?  Call?  And which one of us will he call?  And when??

I then proceeded to mentally pace around the interior of my brain until the phone call o-shame finally  came about 11:00.

He called my number.  I knew it.

So I made his Dad answer my phone.

It was awesome.

“Uh…dad…(voice shaking) can I talk to Mom?”

“What time did you say you were going to be home?”


“Oh.  It’s 9:30 already?”

“Uh.  Sorry I’m late.  Can I please talk to Mom?”

“O.K.  Here she is.”  (stifling laughter)


“I’m at G’s house.  I’m trying to come home right now.”

“What do you mean you’re trying…”  (so.  hard.  not.  to.  laugh.)

“Well…(long pause)…I locked the car and went in.  (Heavy sigh)  ((long pause))  (((dread)))  Gone.”

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN ‘GONE??!!'”  I ask him what he means A LOT.

“I mean it’s not here.”  (both of us stifling laughter/he’s trying not to cry in front of a girl)

“Here.  Tell your dad what you just told me.”

He thinks we’re crying.

We KNOW he is.

“So how are you getting home.”

“Can you come pick me up?”

(pause)  “I’ll be there in 5 minutes.”  hangs up

“Are you taking the allegedly-stolen-mobile?”

(Grin.  Nod.)

I have to imagine the look on New Driver’s face when his dad pulled up in the “stolen” vehicle.

Then later:  “That was the BEST lesson you ever taught me.”

That it was April 1 was just an extra added bonus.

2 responses »

  1. I THOUGHT YOU WERE KIDDING ABOUT THE STOLEN. (in that “Hey Wes, we got you a car PSYCHE- mustve gotten stolen”
    You guys rock. Ima need some help in the future. . . .

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