I Can’t Volunteer Here Any Longer

Standard

(to REO Speedwagon’s “I Can’t Fight This Feeling”)

I can’t volunteer here any longer/I said I’d do a year 10 years ago

I’ve thrown out my left hip sitting with toddlers

They spew in all directions, and the snot is never clear.

I told myself element’ry would be better/But those kids have a knack for smelling fear

‘Cause I feel insecure when we’re together

They attack from all directions, they’re the headlights, I’m the deer.

And even though I’m on time and cause so little strife

I’ve discovered I’m in volunteering limbo for life

And I’m partly serving in hopes that I’ll find a wife.

So we can’t volunteer here anymore.

We’ve forgotten what we started serving for.

Sometimes I wanna scream until I’m hoarse and run right out the door forever

We just can’t volunteer here anymore.

And do all the work the church cannot pay for.

It’s like I always pray on Sunday morn for Gabriel to blow his horn,

Sorry, I can’t volunteer here anymore.

(guitar solo)

I just cried when I first tried helping High School.

Then with Middle School completely lost my mind.

They say things that would make Lady Gaga’s hair curl,

They think bathroom jokes are funny, common sense is hard to find.   

And even though I ponder, was I too like this one time?

I’ve discovered though they need me, I so value my life.

And I’m partly serving so that I won’t have to tithe.

So I can’t volunteer here anymore.

We’ve forgotten what we’ve started serving for.

It’s time to bring this ship in to the shore,

And get up off the floor forever.

We just can’t volunteer here anymore.

I’m like an apple eaten to the core.

But if you were to knock upon my door

And ask me por favor

Maybe I’ll just volunteer for one year more.

(wild applause)

Advertisements

2 responses »

  1. Heard this at a conference this weekend. Assuming you just posted this after hearing or reading it? The performance I saw was well done.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s