What Friends Do


A fellow START experiment blogger inspired me to be a better leader through his thought-provoking references to the wisdom that is Napoleon Dynamite.
Since Movie Quotes are my Love Language, I am compelled to offer my own deep cinematic ponderances on friendship with the assistance of my fictional gal pals Shelby, M’Lynn, Truvy, Annelle, Clairee and Ouiser from none other than the Chick Flick Grand Supreme: Steel Magnolias

Steel Magnolias1

Annelle: Am I interuptin’ something?
Truvy: Naw, I’m just screamin’ at my husband. I can do that anytime.

steel magnolias 8
Husbands are awesome. Husbands are strong and capable and wise.

But husbands are not girlfriends.

A good girlfriend will redirect us when we are screaming at or about our husbands.

steel Magnolias 3
Shelby: My colors are “blush” and “bashful.”
M’Lynn: Her colors are “pink” and “pink.”
Shelby: My colors are “blush” and “bashful.” One shade is much deeper than the other.
M’Lynn: How precious is this weddin’ gonna get, I ask you?

steel magnolias 4
We are not our mothers.

Our daughters are not us.

Good friends help us appreciate our mothers and our daughters and focus on their better qualities.

Truvy: I think there’s a story there…maybe she’s got a past.
Clairee: She cain’t be more’n 18. She hasn’t had time to have a past.
Truvy: Aw, come on, Clairee. This is the 80s. If you can achieve puberty, you can achieve a past.

We all have a past.

Our friends have a past.

Not everyone gets to know ours, and we may never know theirs,

but let’s be brave when it’s time to share honestly with a trustworthy friend.

Also let’s be graceful enough to hear theirs without flinching.

We may help each other heal.

Ouiser Boudreaux: You guessed it. I am having an affair with a Mercedes Benz.

Steel Magnolias 5

Our friends can see things that we don’t care to see. 

It is wise to accept input graciously without becoming defensive.
Truvy: God don’t care where you go to church, long as you show up.

steel magnolias church
It is often surprising when unexpected friends show up (also when expected friends don’t show up)

inside our own church,

outside our church,

and outside our entire sphere of belief . 

There will be people who show up to help us, inspire us, and walk with us through trouble.

Truvy: There is no such thing as natural beauty.
Annelle: (repeats) There is no such thing as natural beauty.
Truvy: You remember that. Or we’re all out of a job.

steel magnolias 6

We actually DO know that there IS such a thing as natural beauty. 

It’s just that it doesn’t negate what we have to offer. 

This is salesmanship at its finest.

We serve a purpose on this earth.

We may think our services aren’t needed when we look around, but others do need our expertise.

We need their support.

We will both be better together.
**What Annelle and Truvy possibly don’t know is that they are providing so much more than outer beauty services in their shop. They provide community, acceptance, concern and celebration–things everyone needs. The up-do’s, the waxings and the manicures are just gravy**
M’Lynn: I just want to hit something. I want to hit it hard. I want to hit it and make it feel as bad as I do.

steel magnolias 7
Friendship hurts.

There is no place so lonely as hurting all alone.

It is so unnecessary, but so common.

There is value in hurting together.  Laughter follows.

Truvy: I haven’t left the house without Lycra on these thighs since I was 14.
Clairee: You were brought up right.

Steel Magnolias 2

That, my friends,  is wisdom straight from the MIV—Magnolias Insightful Version: Train up your cellulite in the way that it should hide, and when it is old, it shall not flab out from it. Good friends can be counted on to listen to you brag a little and agree with your positive choices.
Shelby: My dream is to sit on the front porch, covered in grandchildren sayin’ things like, “NO.” and “STOP THAT.”
Steel Magnolias Shelby

Our vision for the future shapes our difficult choices today.
What is your favorite quote from this movie? Will you share a thought on friendship?


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