Tag Archives: ministry

Loathe Entirely


I have been thinking about haters for over a month now. I actually thought I didn’t have any or wouldn’t have any.  And then one showed up around 7am on the day that our START assignment was to ignore them—or at the very least, don’t give their opinion too much weight.
Only she was calling me out for something I did that she didn’t like. She wasn’t really hating me, she just wasn’t getting her way, wasn’t being patient, and was acting poorly.  And she was doing all that AT me.
I don’t really think it is accurate for me to call her a 3D “hater” because:

1) She doesn’t know me well enough to hate me and

2) She and I weren’t on the same timetable for the favor she was requesting of me.

Her thought was ASAP, mine was in a day or two. She found this unreasonable.
Her online spew AT ME caused me shock & surprise, which feels oddly like outrage. I immediately began mentally listing things I already am doing and became extremely defensive and rebellious—wanting to make her wait.  At the same time, I battled within my mind over doing a better job with more time vs making her happy by doing it NOW but substandard. Furthermore, I was no longer in the right frame of mind to fulfill her request in her way OR mine.   Because it had to do with writing, which is on my to do list for the risk I wanted to take that round, I felt even more thwarted if I ignored her request completely. Although I succeeded in not responding to her rant, I did not do so well with the “ignoring.”  She is VERY hard to ignore in real life AND online.

In the end, on that same day I ended up giving her a version of what she asked for, although it would have been a better version had she waited.  So who won?  Was it a tie?  What was the desired outcome?  I find myself a peacemaker, but should I have truly avoided and ignored this request for an “above and beyond” ministry favor from someone in the church?  I don’t know. I was paralyzed creatively until I got that task off my plate.   Afterwards she kind of gave me a “was that so hard?”  kind of attitude vs true gratitude, but that part I can ignore with ease.
My definition of a real live 3D hater is someone who knows you, defies you, and comes against you at every turn. This person may be jealous, hurting or both.
My definition of a START hater is a pesky stranger who pops up at inconvenient times when you are focused on your goal and about to do something risky or awesome and triggers the internal voices—be they negative, self-defeating, or just plain distracting.
Some haters love you but hate your dream. Don’t ignore them.
Some haters hate you but love your dream. Don’t ignore them either.
Some haters hate you and your dream. Others hate everybody and all their dreams too.
Those are the ones to ignore.

Unless God calls you to love one. Good luck with that.

Orange Breakout #2 Craig Jutila “Viruses, Riots & Velcro”


This whole breakout topic and analogy was ironic and hilarious as Craig described himself as a germophobe who wipes down his hotel rooms.  He said he was like the TV character “Monk” but not QUITE as bad.  He spoke of quarantining twins when one got sick–realizing that if they caught the other’s virus quickly, it would be 3 days of sickness, instead of 7 days where one gets well THEN the other gets sick.

VIRUS = the VISION we want to spread.  Needs a host with excitement, energy and passion for the clear unanimous vision.  A host that is contagious!

Once a virus finds a host cell it has to reproduce itself.  In leaders, we have to replicate vision, mission, values, goals and approach.  We do this by getting close enough to infect others with the vision. The R “nought” refers to the equation for each person that is infected, how many other people they are likely to infect.  The larger the “r nought” factor,  the more powerful the spread of the virus.  We want to develop volunteers that infect the most amount of people.  To produce viral volunteers you want an epidemic of energy, excitement and passion for the area in which you want others to serve.

RIOTS:  The most important person in a “riot” is the 3rd person.  The first person is the pioneer.  The 2nd person is irrelevant (humor)–just a follower.  The 3rd person ushers everyone else and the 4th-8 millionth = masses.  So in leadership, we need that first person with the vision, they need a follower, and the 3rd one is the tipping point.


The First Person: Visionary

The Second Person: Verifies

The Third Person: Validates

The Fourth – Five Hundredth Person: Viral

Other Examples of The 3rd Person: Crossing The Street

A bunch of people at a crosswalk with a ‘don’t walk’ signal. If one or two people go, it does not mean everybody else will go. But once the third person goes, the masses will follow and jaywalk together.

Foreigner Standing Ovation

When the first person starts clapping, it might be a little awkward. But once a third party stands and joins the mini-movement, it proves that applause is indeed acceptable and the rest of the audience will follow.


Discovered by Swiss engineer George de Mestral in 1948 from burrs in his sock.  He was irritated by the burrs and it rubbed him the wrong way.  Instead of staying irritated, he studied it and asked, “How could this be useful?”

Through great discouragement can come great discovery.

In 1990 the White House staff coined the word “velcrosis” because people swarmed

around the President or “stuck” to him whenever he made public appearances.

Astronauts have a patch of VELCRO inside their helmet so they can scratch their nose.

Ask yourself:

Am I contagious with our vision?

Who is the 3rd person who will be the tipping point in our ministry?

Who can I thank for sticking with me?

The enemy is behind our work attempting to wipe it down with Clorox, remove every trace and shut down our contagious work for the Kingdom.  Be strategically contagious!